Life and Times of Skippy el Turturro
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Andrew "The Mighty" Culp's LiveJournal:
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| Wednesday, April 20th, 2005 | | 3:58 pm |
Question, Jerks . . .
"Sacrilicious Apparitions" or "Mmm, mmm, mmmanifestations"? I made my live debut at open mic night at Espress Yourself and sucked in my opinion. I'll have to get a little better at it. This guy named Luke covered the song that I played later in the night. In one night, I made my live debut AND was covered. Sweet. | | Thursday, April 14th, 2005 | | 5:51 pm |
Guess What Color My Hand Will Be Tomorrow and Get a Free Pat on the Back!!!
So, my right hand continues to be at a size that is not normal to how my left hand is. It all started one sunny Saturday afternoon while working for my uncle on a brick job. I was taking some scaffold down, and took a crossbar off wrong. The scaffold fell, the bottom of the crossbar still attached to the scaffold. The crossbar clamped down on my hand, and I couldn't get the scaffold back up to take the pressure off of the crossbar, and, it turn, my hand. I had to call my uncle a couple of times before he came over and picked the scaffold up. My hand is mainly a gross yellow-type color. My knuckles, however, and a reddish-purple, and it looks like its getting darker from my knuckles up my hand. DOESN'T IT SOUND FUN?!?!? Went to the Westport show with Send the Dawn and Iscariot last Saturday, but didn't see either bands. It's a shame that there are some stupid girls in this world that think it's cool to get attention by ruining the good times of others. Hopefully, the Westport won't be lost as a venue. There was something else that I was going to talk about here ... but I can't remember ... The download that's on CulpJamz is down (7-day expiration on YouSendIt). I'm going to open up a MySpace Music account. You can upload four MP3s on there, so I'm going to open that and upload "The Turtle Song" onto that. When I get more things, I'll put them up on MySpace. OH! I remember what I was going to. I was going to post a relatively new song. I just thought of a name for this song a little while ago, and the lyrics are below. The song is called "Sacrilicious Apparitions". I was going to put this on my second album (If Macy Gray Can Make a Career in Music, Why Can't I?), but I'm thinking of pushing this up to Andrew "The Mighty" Culp's Greatest Hits. Leave a comment and let me know what you think. "Sacrilicious Apparitions" Virgin Mary on my grilled cheese Jesus Christ is on a tortilla There's a cob of corn that looks like Judas Iscariot Found by some chick named Maria Just another day in Mexico Just another sighting of someone I know It ain't Elvis and it ain't Tupac Can't you see all the thousands flock? Jesus is rusted on a chimney I move back and forth but he keeps looking at me He's like a religious Mona Lisa Is that Christ hangin' from the tower of Pisa? Cause its Mary on my grilled cheese Jesus Christ is on a tortilla There's a scarecrow that looks like John the Baptizer Mark and Luke hangin' in a pizzeria Just another day in Mexico Just another sighting of someone I know It ain't Elvis, it ain't Tupac Can't you see all the thousands flock Virgin Mary's on my grilled cheese She said "Don't eat me!" She begged me "Please!" I can't turn down a delicious sandwich, though. Devoured that grilled cheese and away I go-o-o. Virgin Mary was on my grilled cheese Jesus Christ is on a tortilla Just another day in Mexico Just another sighting idea Someone - someone I know Someone - someone I know Someone - someone I know Someone - someone I know Another day in Mexico Hey, look! There's my friend, Pedro. Sounds like he's got some important news. Jesus sighting on somebody's bruise. OH! Just another day in Mexico. Just another sighting of someone I know It ain't Elvis and it ain't Tupac Watch all of the masses flock! OH OH OH! Virgin Mary on my grilled cheese Christ Jesus is on my tortilla Corn on the cob looks like Judas Iscariot Found by some chick named Maria Current Music: Sage Francis - Hey, Bobby | | Friday, April 8th, 2005 | | 7:20 pm |
Ranting About Gas Prices
I was at my grandma's house yesterday, and my aunt was there visiting. Somehow (it's always somehow), the subject of gas prices came up. Who knows how, who knows why, who knows somethin'? I mention that I filled up for $2.17 a gallon in Lake Station, and then I drove into Portage and gas was $2.39. My aunt brought up a valid point. She exclaimed, "Look at us! We're happy, these days, when gas is $2.15! It shouldn't even be close to $2!" This brings me to my rant. GAS IS OVER TWO DOLLARS!!! Why is gas over two dollars? Why is gas so friggin' expensive? If the age required to get a driver's license is raised, those kids should only feel lucky. They don't have to shell out ridiculous amounts of money to get from here to there. Here's is my question: WHERE IS THE OIL THAT BUSH WENT TO WAR FOR?!? Isn't it time Iraq paid the U.S. back for getting rid of Hussein? That's all I'm saying. ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------- - In other news, the guitar lesson went great today, and we have some music to a certain song that is going on Andrew "The Mighty" Culp's Greatest Hits! When I sang the song to him, he said that it sounded "Punk Country" to him. Take that as you wish. I'm not sure yet whether or not it's good. Current Music: Sage Francis - Hang Time | | Tuesday, March 22nd, 2005 | | 10:44 pm |
| | 10:39 pm |
New System of a Down Music
I found this and decided to post it (with Kyle, especially, in mind). **EDIT** The link doesn't work anymore. It goes to an error page. They must have deleted the thread it was in. If you didn't get it downloaded, sucks for you, but you can simply listen to it the 83 1/2 times it'll play on radio during the duration of an hour. System of a Down - B.Y.O.B.(Bring Your Own Bombs) Holy crap. This song is nuts. I just got punched in the face by an unbelievably delicious dose of music. Even better than Osama being bombed to hell. Current Music: System of a Down - B.Y.O.B. | | Saturday, March 19th, 2005 | | 9:05 pm |
| | Sunday, February 27th, 2005 | | 12:14 am |
Dead Car, New Car, Red Car, Blue Car
This entry really doesn't have anything to do with a red car or a blue car, but I figured I'd make the subject sound a little bit more like a Dr. Suess book. The Black Beast is dead. I saved the queen from its grasp today, though. Yeah, that may not make any sense to anybody that isn't me. The Olds died last Sunday. It lasted almost a year with me. It was around 180,000 and there was a lot of stuff wrong with it. I guess it's a good thing that it died. I saw an ad for a Buick Skylark in the paper yesterday, and me and Dad went by today and ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-checked it out. Green, two door, nice piece of machinery. The only bad damage was the seat is kind of jacked up, but it didn't feel bad when I test drove it. It runs great. It has a CD player (RADIO THAT WORKS!!!). It has turn signals (THAT WORK!!!). It has the normal speedometer, gas gauge, odometer and all that (non-electric normal deal)(AND IT WORKS!!!). I'm excited. Dad put $100 on it so the guy took the "For Sale" signs off. The tax check comes in Tuesday, and the 'rents are gonna buy it using that. Of course, Dad had to put a level of guilt in me by mentioning that this money was vacation money. I went shopping today with my sister (who just so happens to be visiting this weekend). I bought a shirt from Spencers that says "Free Speech" and one from Old Navy that has a cool drawing graphic of a band playing. Both on clearance, both cheap. Bryce and the I made a game. "Duel Pool." In my head: "Dool Pool." Two cue balls on the table at once, and you hit your balls at the same time. You don't have to wait for the other person to go. First to get their balls in and the eight ball in wins. It's a pretty intense game, with much physicality. I'm pretty tired now from it. Oh. Fo. Sho. There's this guy in Portage that lives by Jones Elementary that I'm gonna start taking guitar lessons with. I figure if this album is going to be made, I should know how to play guitar. Speaking of Andrew "The Mighty" Culp's Greatest Hits, I asked Bryce if he'd play guitar, and said he would. I'm gonna go over to his A P T when I get mah wheels and possibly do things with him related to said debut album. So ... yeah ... thats ... the facts ... Jack. Current Music: Sage Francis - Agony in Her Body | | Wednesday, February 9th, 2005 | | 9:35 pm |
The Cat Has Been Successfully Let Out of the Bag
Um ... the cat has been successfully let out of the bag. The secret song that I wrote has been revealed to the one that it's about. The jury is still out on whether or not I can use it. She doesn't like the picture that I want to use. Heh. I think it's perfect for the cover. That's all I have to say for now. OH! And check out the following: http://www.pumpupthemovie.com/toss.html Current Music: some Tool song | | Sunday, February 6th, 2005 | | 4:35 pm |
"Betterman"
We live in a world full of firsts. First sound. First step. First laugh. First day of school. First kiss. First time. First job. First paycheck. First marriage. First day of the rest of your life. I've been very indecisive this weekend. In fact, I think the only thing that I've been decisive about is the fact that I don't know why I've been indecisive. I was indecisive about whether to drive to school on Friday or not. I was indecisive about going to Michigan this weekend. I was indecisive about going to Michigan today. I was indecisive about going to a Superbowl Party. So, what happened this weekend? I didn't drive to school. I didn't go to Michigan yesterday, nor today. I didn't go to a Superbowl party that my family was invited to. As my parents were walking out the door, my dad asked me a question. That question was "Why aren't you going?" I told him that I didn't know why I was going. Then, for what I believe to be the first time ever, he asked "What's wrong?" It wasn't in a sarcastic way. It wasn't in a chastising way. It wasn't in an angry way. It was in a loving, caring, fatherly way. I've never had an open relationship with my dad. He comes home, we greet each other, he takes his shower and stays in his room until dinner. After dinner, he goes back to his room and does God knows what. I've never had full, meaningful conversations with him about life. I wish I did, but I never have. I don't know why, but him asking me that question cleared my mind. It just ... cleared my mind. I'm going to take a walk. Bye. Current Music: Pearl Jam - Betterman | | Wednesday, January 26th, 2005 | | 9:55 pm |
I'm Going to Submit This to the Pow Wow
Letter to the Editor: Public Service Announcement - Don’t Let Pop Culture Kill Common Sense Imagine, if you would, that you’re in a class here at Portage High School. The topic of the September 11th tragedies comes up. The teacher, who is telling of how media covered September 11th, continuously refers to it as "September 11, 2001." From the back of the classroom, six words are spoken that completely renders you speechless. "I thought 9/11 was in 2000." Now, if you please, imagine that you are in one of the various world geography classes provided by PHS. The class is given the assignment to color the continents on a map of the globe. The fellow student next to you proceeds to get his/her book out to refer to as he/she figures out which continents are which. When asked where "Africa" is on the map, he/she points to "Australia." This student doesn’t realize that Mexico is part of North America. He/she also is unaware of where the equator is, nor the south or north poles. How would you react to the preceding situations? Would the reaction be one of anger? One of confusion? One of astonishment? Maybe, one of pure and utter disgust? It seems like this is something that is happening more and more with people today. Important things like the correct year that the September 11th tragedies occurred or the correct placement of continents on the globe seem to take second priority to things that pop culture shoves down our throats. One may not know what happened today on a world basis, but they’ll be able to talk about last night’s episode of "One Tree Hill" or "The O.C." with perfect knowledge on the subject. Things that should be common knowledge are pushed aside for things that are, in reality, less important. The challenge is now being set. You are being called out. Set down "Seventeen" and pick up "Newsweek." Turn off "The O.C." and turn on CNN. Take Ryan Cabrera and Destiny’s Child out of your CD players. Instead, fill that space with Sage Francis or Living Colour. If you’re desperate, pick up an atlas. At least learn where the continents are. Please, learn where the continents are. Thank you for reading. Sincerely, Andrew Culp Current Music: A Perfect Circle - Orestes | | Saturday, January 22nd, 2005 | | 5:59 pm |
Proving Once Again That Spongebob is Bad for the Kids . . .
He's gay! Seriously, Spongebob Squarepants is gay. Don't believe it? Read it straight from BBC, themselves. He's a homosexual!!! This one's funny, too. I saw "Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events" on Wednesday, and it's a good flick. People should go see it. I saw "Paparazzi" last night. That's also a good flick. It sort of brings questions into one's mind; questions like, "Could this really happen?" You never know what could happen. I mean, "The Insider" was based of a true story. Who knows, Jennifer Aniston may be killing some paparazzo right now. It looks like its going on inch 743 in the hazardous "BLIZZARD '05!!!" I want to go play out in the snow. Maybe I will tomorrow. Yes ... maybe ... So, yeah, I really don't have that much to say right now other than what I have previously said. There's this new Vin Diesel movie where Vin plays a disgraced Navy S.E.A.L. who is given the assignment to protect some kids from an evil scientist who has a top secret experiment in their house. I feel sorry for his career. Current Music: Chevelle - Another Know It All | | Monday, December 27th, 2004 | | 12:57 pm |
Spontaneous Trips to Michigan Return Fruitful Memories and Brown Sweaters
My friend, Brandon, called me on Thursday asking if I wanted to go to Michigan with him to visit my sister-in-law who he, by chance, met the week before and they hit it all off. So, on Friday, we went to Michigan. Friday night we . . . didn't do that much. Went over my sister's and watched Napoleon Dynamite and then hung out. On Saturday, we pretty much did nothing really. My sister-in-law made some brownies, and we played a couple o' board games, then went to dig up this box that a couple of peoples up there wanted to. Freaked out some jerks, made some phone calls, called it a night. Saw Spanglish on Sunday. That movie is pretty good. Came back today to find that neither my LPU 4 package, nor the Halo 2 soundtrack has come in the mail. Hopefully it will today, or I will be thouroughly urked at the United States Postal Service. | | Wednesday, December 22nd, 2004 | | 11:21 pm |
Grandpa Gave Me a Windbreaker . . . Sweet . . .
What's up, kids? How's the doings doing? I cleaned my room. Two days. Its clean. I give it a month and it'll be trashed again. Heh . . . yeah. That's how things work in the O.C. You'd better believe it, B. So, yeah, that's the second accomplishment of this break, cleaning my room. The first, of course, being that I read "Confessions of an Heiress" from cover to cover . . . or . . . picture of Paris Hilton to picture of Paris Hilton. Whichever way you'd prefer to look at it. The rest of this week will involve boning up on my guitar skills, and, hopefully, getting good enough to record some things for my new, hit debut album. That's what I hope. It would be cool if what I hope could somehow come to be not just what I hope, but also truthful, as well. I fell today. I went to get the mail and slid on this big ol' sheet o' ice. Now my back hurts like a mofo (especially after the uncomfortable sitting position at the movies). My neck hurts as well. Falling sucks. Especially when your neck snaps back, and you hear several cracks come from such snapping action. I saw "Meet the Fockers" tonight. Its a very good movie, considering its a sequel. You should go see it, if you wish to see movies that involve humorous things happening throughout them. Yeah. That's how it goes. Meredith sucks. Oh, yeah, my grandpa gave me a windbreaker. It's friggin' sweet. Old people clothes. Nothin' better. Current Music: Marylin Manson (and various others) - Redeemer | | Sunday, December 19th, 2004 | | 3:43 pm |
Things I Learned From "Confessions of an Heiress"
Paris Hilton's hair is actually curly!!! Her favorite shade of blue is baby blue. She loves Naomi Campbell . . . and Pharell . . . and Nicky Hilton . . . and Gwen Stefani . . . and various other celebrities. She doesn't like the nudist colony that she and Nicole went to for Simple Life 2, but she does enjoy Paris. She doesn't wear the same outfit twice, and neither should you! If you want to act like an heiress, be a complete snob but say that you aren't. ^ That isn't actually in the book, but it's my interpretation, which is always right. Seriously . . . if you really want to lose brain cells and want an easy read while doing so, pick up "Confessions of an Heiress." She has a chapter about her favorite hairstylists, fashions, the fashion shows she likes to attend, makeup, even about three spreads on her favorite colors. Most of the book is pictures of her. Pictures . . . of her. You wouldn't think so by the obnoxious pink picture of her on the cover, would you? I got it today and I'm almost half-way through it . . . and I've read it for maybe a total of an hour and fifteen minutes. It's mind-numbing. Truly mind-numbing. If Paris Hilton were standing within arms reach of me right now, I would punch her in the side of the head. Seriously. Honestly. Right in the side of the head. No joke. By the by, I borrowed it from the library. You should to. Don't waste money on this crap. I mean . . . I'm sure you know that already. Yeah. | | Saturday, December 18th, 2004 | | 7:54 pm |
Meredith Sucks, and Its Time For the Fun to Start
Winter Break, punks! Haha! Time for the fun to start, and I'm making the most of this break. Cleaning my room, playing the didgeridoo, working on my NEW, HIT DEBUT ALBUM (check out the whatnots at www.maxpages.com/culpjamz), and reading "Confessions of an Heiress," the Paris Hilton autobiography. If I come back to school in two weeks with only .05 percent of my brain functions left...thats why...the Paris Hilton thing...Yeah... Care to donate to the making of "Andrew "The Mighty" Culp's Greatest Hits" monitarily? Go to www.maxpages.com/culpjamz and go to the Contact section to contact me about any type of monitary donation you would most assuredly enjoy providing. Money is good, but it isn't good unless you have it. Current Music: Jane's Addiction - "Superhero" | | Sunday, December 12th, 2004 | | 7:12 pm |
Didgeridoo and a Cop Stop, Too
I bought a didgeridoo from the mall in Battle Creek this weekend, SWEET! I'm excited about all o' that. Josiah burned Fruity Loops onto a disc for me, SWEET! I'm still gonna catch up with him and find out the stuffs about it. Um...I changed some wordage on Jerks after being tailgated by a FRIGGIN' TOUR BUS! TourCo Travels, you can suck my left toe! I got pulled over on Friday for goin' 82 in a 70. Alls well, I really shouldn't have been going that fast, cause the roads were all wet on Friday night. She was nice, I just got a warning. Alls well that ends well. Second time I've been pulled over. Thats all. Nothing but else. Oh, I mean...I saw Ocean's Twelve on Friday. It wasn't that great. | | Thursday, December 9th, 2004 | | 9:44 pm |
Michigan Calls My Name
Goin' to Michigan tomorrow, and stayin' the weekend with Stacie and Josiah. (Excited.) Josiah said he'd do the beat for Jerks with me. SWEET! Wouldn't it be awesome if I could get Jerks done this weekend? If that happens, I may put three of the deals on a CD and give 'em to people to check out, and have their friends check out, you know? Yeah, thats all there is with that. PSH! HAHA! Meredith sucks! Current Music: Bush - Testosterone | | Thursday, November 25th, 2004 | | 10:13 pm |
The Success of the Beach Boys Seems a Mystery to Me
Their songs really have nothing to do with anything. Literally, surfing and girls. Surfing and girls. Surfing and girls. California Girls? I Get Around? Hmm...I wonder what I Get Around is about? They truly are the first boy band who had nothing good to say, yet, the Beach Boys are great. I love 'em. Their lyrics really suck, though. I feel...conflicted. Here's another song about surfing. So, Maxpages is pretty stupid and taking as long as possible to send me the password to my site on their. I want to get on their so I can put up my lyrics and whatnot so I don't lose 'em. I don't know what the FREAKING HOLDUP IS?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! So, the track listing is done. Unless I think of anything else to write about, the track listing is as was below, except a Closing Thoughts track at the end, where I'll just say whatever is on my mind. I'll do that one when I'm done with all of it, and I'll just jerk around on that last one. There's also a (heh) surprise song thats going on there. I'm keeping it under wraps, so that the certain (hee hee) person that it's about is surprised when (LAUGHING OUT LOUD) she hears it...or is it about a guy? NOBODY WILL KNOW!!! NoBoDy!!!!! I'm gonna buy a microphone. I want to buy it tomorrow...if I can get some money out of my mom and pay her back...hmm... Another song about surfing. I changed my first verse on Jerks. Its a lot better than the last one, which sucked pretty hardcore. I may have to send a reminder to Jason, since I don't seem to be getting anything from him. Oh...and...MEREDITH SUCKS! Current Music: The Beach Boys - I Get Around | | Saturday, November 20th, 2004 | | 9:14 pm |
| | Friday, November 19th, 2004 | | 10:19 pm |
British a Cappella Songs, and Whatnot
You know that "Life is Boring and the Tales of Richard Harding" that I mentioned last time? I don't know where that is. Literally...I'd forgotten all about it until I just read about it here moments ago. Went to see Dracula (BLAH!). Nothing quite like spending $6.00 to see something that you were talked into going to see a four minute dance routine of the girls in your yearbook class. Bunch o' skanks! I mean...no...not skanks...opposite of skanks...unskanks... eMOTIVe is great! As is Axis of Justice Concert Series Volume 1! The CD is now called Andrew "The Mighty" Culp's Greatest Hits. I'm still planning the same coverart, or at least make a shirt for the song "Bag on Head" that would have the previous idea of coverart on it, because, quite frankly, I want people to where shirts bearing a picture of me half-naked. That'll be for the benefit of the country. *untitled* A Shocking Experience Coming on to You The Unfinished Song Bag on Head The Turtle Song or Today, Yesterday, Manitoba Ode to My Dislike Jerks Wannabe (Spice Girls cover) Tentative track listing? I did "The Turtle Song or Today, Yesterday, Manitoba" after Ryke told me to write him a song about turtle (plural of turtle [long story {all right, not so long of a story}]) in the past tense. So, after using the facilities (and seeing possible lyrics) I grabbed my voice recorder and improved a song about turtle, a Cappella...and in a British accent. Its hilarious in a "What-the-F" kinda way. Great stuff...it'll go on the album as is. Waiting on Jason to do his lyrics for "Jerks." The beat is gonna be great. Morse code. Morse code. |
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